Leave Bill-O Alone!

Dear Readers,

One of my heroes, Bill O'Reilly, has taken a lot of heat the last few days over some allegedly racist and bigoted remarks. Apparently, some people think that stereotyping negative attributes and believing all members of a single race share the same qualities are racist activities. As if.

Dear readers, old Teddy isn't so technologically adept. But if I was, I'd make a video similar to this well-known one, but substitute Bill's name for Britney's:



Keep fighting the good fight against the liberal media conspiracy, Bill, and thank you for loving America!

-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.

Thursdays with Theodore, Episode 9/13/07

Dear Readers,

Welcome to this week's episode of "Thursdays with Theodore!" To the mail bag . . .

General David P. writes:

Dear Dr. Trumblebunks, I, Esq.,

What did you think of my testimony this week?

~Dave

Dear Dave, you were wonderful. Now that we've achieved so much success, we can draw down our number of troops. Keep on, keeping on, sir!

General David P., thank you for loving America!

-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.

Make Up Your Mind, Libs

Dear Readers,

They're at it again. Yep, the old flip-flop Dems are back. You see, a new article came out about some species being on the verge of extinction. The pro-evolution, anti-God crowd is complaining about species supposedly going extinct.

What makes this ironic, you see, is that the evolution crowd base their little theory on the notion that certain species go extinct as adaptations are made and new species emerge. In those instances, extinction is good. But now, because I like to drive a big truck, I'm supposedly evil because a few monkeys are dying?

Which is it, libs - extinction is natural, or extinction is bad? Make up your minds. And you wonder why your little monkey-man theory has no support or respect!

Dear pro-evolution crowd, why do you hate America?

-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.

9/11 Remembrance

Dear Readers,

Leave it to such a special day to bring me back. Let's recall the lives that were lost, and the unity - however fleeting - we gained. And let's hope such a tragedy never happens again.

Dear readers, thank you for loving America!

-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.