Celebrate Good Times, Dear Readers!
Dear Readers,
I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., have said it a million times: when Big Oil does well, we all do well! And guess what?!? Big Oil is doing well! Gas prices have hit a record high, so the stock market is taking off like rocket!
What does this mean for you, dear readers? First, you need to thank your lucky stars and pray for $4.00/gallon gas asap. Second, support Big Oil - drive some more. The more gas you buy, the more profits they make, and the more it trickles down to the poorest of the poor.
Now, the west-coast, liberal elite, free market-haters are up in arms. They claim that the poor can't afford this gas, and thus wouldn't be able to afford to drive back and forth to work. I say that's hogwash. They can make $7.25 an hour; paying half of that per gallon of gas still leaves them with over $3/hour for other necessities!
Raise your glasses high tonight for the patriots in charge of the oil companies!
Big oil, thank you for loving America!
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., have said it a million times: when Big Oil does well, we all do well! And guess what?!? Big Oil is doing well! Gas prices have hit a record high, so the stock market is taking off like rocket!
What does this mean for you, dear readers? First, you need to thank your lucky stars and pray for $4.00/gallon gas asap. Second, support Big Oil - drive some more. The more gas you buy, the more profits they make, and the more it trickles down to the poorest of the poor.
Now, the west-coast, liberal elite, free market-haters are up in arms. They claim that the poor can't afford this gas, and thus wouldn't be able to afford to drive back and forth to work. I say that's hogwash. They can make $7.25 an hour; paying half of that per gallon of gas still leaves them with over $3/hour for other necessities!
Raise your glasses high tonight for the patriots in charge of the oil companies!
Big oil, thank you for loving America!
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
Labels: Big Oil, free market, Gas Prices
posted by Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq. at 7:11 PM
3 Comments:
I'm sorry, I blame Iraq for these gas price increases. Call me a liberal hypocrite (which I certainly am not). Here in the South, I never saw gas prices go above $2 a gallon until after Iraq. Sorry, it's Iraq to me. Also, I read somewhere in the liberal media...he hehe, that those people in Kansas aren't getting as much help because all the resources are in Iraq. Sorry, I've turned against Iraq with Katrina and have made many connections to it...
Jack X
the Goldwater Republican, sorry
That should read...
Jack X,
The Goldwater Republican
Jack X,
You're entitled to your opinion, but I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., choose to continue to support our President, continue to support our troops, and continue to love America!
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
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