A Slight Tip of the Cap to the Papists, For Once
Dear Readers,
You know by now that I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., am no fan of the papists, being as they are anti-American and hate the Bible by suggesting that the teaching that we come from monkeys is ok. Further, they're always preaching peace, at a time when war against the Islamofascists is needed. Don't they realize that we have to fight in Iraq, despite the fact that the NIE found that we're actually creating more terrorists and the little fact that the people who bombed us on 9/11 came from Saudi Arabia and Afghanistan? If I didn't know any better, I'd think the papists were lock-step members of the west-coast, liberal elite, hate-America-first crowd.
But, this week, at their fall conference, America's Catholic bishops reaffirmed the Church's position against abortion, homosexual activity, and contraception. Thank goodness. It's about time that Church took a stand against us being forced to be gay-married and to have to gay-adopt. And birth control? I'm not sure who uses this new-fangled devil's brew, but the only family planning one should do is to prepare the crib for a new baby. Abortion? It's simply domestic terrorism by another name.
America's Catholic bishops, for a change, I salute you. Now, if only you west-coast, liberal elites could find a way to stop raping children, since ALL of you do that. Then we'll be ok.
Papist bishops, for the time being, thank you for loving America!
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
You know by now that I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., am no fan of the papists, being as they are anti-American and hate the Bible by suggesting that the teaching that we come from monkeys is ok. Further, they're always preaching peace, at a time when war against the Islamofascists is needed. Don't they realize that we have to fight in Iraq, despite the fact that the NIE found that we're actually creating more terrorists and the little fact that the people who bombed us on 9/11 came from Saudi Arabia and Afghanistan? If I didn't know any better, I'd think the papists were lock-step members of the west-coast, liberal elite, hate-America-first crowd.
But, this week, at their fall conference, America's Catholic bishops reaffirmed the Church's position against abortion, homosexual activity, and contraception. Thank goodness. It's about time that Church took a stand against us being forced to be gay-married and to have to gay-adopt. And birth control? I'm not sure who uses this new-fangled devil's brew, but the only family planning one should do is to prepare the crib for a new baby. Abortion? It's simply domestic terrorism by another name.
America's Catholic bishops, for a change, I salute you. Now, if only you west-coast, liberal elites could find a way to stop raping children, since ALL of you do that. Then we'll be ok.
Papist bishops, for the time being, thank you for loving America!
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
posted by Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq. at 11:18 PM
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