My Greatest Apologies
Dear Readers,
I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., apologize for leaving you unguided with my sharp insight for the last couple of days. I intend to be back to posting regularly within the next day or so, but as I am still on vacation, I am unable to make any promises. For now, I will simply offer a solution to the current crisis in the Middle East.
Dear Readers, I have often advocated a simple strategy to minimize the risk to American troops in terms of cleaning up the Middle East: carpet bombing. From the north, to the south, and spanning from the east to the west, old Teddy says to carpet bomb all of it. All of those countries except Israel harbor terrorists, right? Well, we'll take them all out and replace them with democracies, and all of our troubles will be solved!
Those of you who oppose democracies in the Middle East, why do you hate America?
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., apologize for leaving you unguided with my sharp insight for the last couple of days. I intend to be back to posting regularly within the next day or so, but as I am still on vacation, I am unable to make any promises. For now, I will simply offer a solution to the current crisis in the Middle East.
Dear Readers, I have often advocated a simple strategy to minimize the risk to American troops in terms of cleaning up the Middle East: carpet bombing. From the north, to the south, and spanning from the east to the west, old Teddy says to carpet bomb all of it. All of those countries except Israel harbor terrorists, right? Well, we'll take them all out and replace them with democracies, and all of our troubles will be solved!
Those of you who oppose democracies in the Middle East, why do you hate America?
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
posted by Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq. at 6:40 PM
4 Comments:
So, Ted, what do you think of President Bush's little outburst at dinner to Tony Blair today?
Look, this divinely-inspired President is a straight shooter! He doesn't speak in fancy diplomat words. He speaks from the heart and shoots from the hip. It's about time!
it's just a bit "ironic," when you see Bush as this wholesome "Family Guy" who supports censorship, yet blurts out one of the words you can't say on television on...television.
Dear Anonymous:
It's obvious that this is just another example of the west-coast, liberal elite liberal media trying to make our divinely-inspired President look bad. And this, of course, isn't the first time. They can't beat him in elections, so they try to take him down with lies printed in recycled, tree-hugger paper.
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
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