An Eye-Opening Trip, Part II
Dear Readers,
I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., promised yesterday to share more of my experiences from the west-coast, liberal elite Field Museum with you. Far be it from me to disappoint you, my dear and loyal readers! Part I discussed these liberals' take on the age of the earth. Let me now address an even more dangerous and ridiculous idea: evolution.
It's obvious to anyone with a brain that we didn't come from monkeys. Yet, this is what the west-coast, liberal elite scientists want us to believe. For them, all of life came from a monkey. Dinosaurs, whales, birds, frogs, and people, all from a monkey. Folks, as you clearly realize, that would have to be one magical monkey!
The origin of life can be found in the Bible. Not only is it in there, but you can even find two versions, in case you doubt one of them. Now, the west-coast, liberal elite theologians want to say the two versions are somewhat incompatible and point to this as evidence that the Bible should not be read literally. These Godless liberals want us to believe God didn't write the Bible. This is one of those areas where I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., have drawn a line in the sand, and I will not allow these liberal lies to persist!
This evolution bunk comes from Darwin and his invention of evolution. Dear readers, you know as well as I do how ridiculous Darwinism is, but I will discuss this nutcase and his inventions tomorrow on the last part of my discussion of my trip to the Field Museum. Suffice it to say, few historical figures are as ridiculous as this guy who claimed to sail around on a beagle!
Scientists, why do you hate God and America!
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., promised yesterday to share more of my experiences from the west-coast, liberal elite Field Museum with you. Far be it from me to disappoint you, my dear and loyal readers! Part I discussed these liberals' take on the age of the earth. Let me now address an even more dangerous and ridiculous idea: evolution.
It's obvious to anyone with a brain that we didn't come from monkeys. Yet, this is what the west-coast, liberal elite scientists want us to believe. For them, all of life came from a monkey. Dinosaurs, whales, birds, frogs, and people, all from a monkey. Folks, as you clearly realize, that would have to be one magical monkey!
The origin of life can be found in the Bible. Not only is it in there, but you can even find two versions, in case you doubt one of them. Now, the west-coast, liberal elite theologians want to say the two versions are somewhat incompatible and point to this as evidence that the Bible should not be read literally. These Godless liberals want us to believe God didn't write the Bible. This is one of those areas where I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., have drawn a line in the sand, and I will not allow these liberal lies to persist!
This evolution bunk comes from Darwin and his invention of evolution. Dear readers, you know as well as I do how ridiculous Darwinism is, but I will discuss this nutcase and his inventions tomorrow on the last part of my discussion of my trip to the Field Museum. Suffice it to say, few historical figures are as ridiculous as this guy who claimed to sail around on a beagle!
Scientists, why do you hate God and America!
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
posted by Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq. at 7:00 PM
2 Comments:
Only someone who can accept Bush's doublespeak can dismiss the conflicts in the bible.
Why do you hate Bush and God?
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