An Eye-Opening Trip, Part I
Dear Readers,
Today, I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., had a truly horrifying experience, as I went with Mrs. Trumblebunks, I, Esq., to the Field Museum in Chicago. I, of course, do realize that I should have known what was in store, but I entered with an open mind, which is something that the west-coast, liberal elite is incapable of. My experience has left me with several stories to share, which I will do over the next few days. For now, I'll start with one of the most blatant attempts of liberal revisionist history.
One of the sections that we entered traced the evolution of the earth (I'll be addressing and debunking the evolution myth in the days to come, dear readers). The event started with the first known signs of life on earth, and they said that was something like four-thousand trillion years ago, although I can't recall for certain, as I was so outraged. This is the junk they're teaching our children, who are our future!
All of us open-minded Americans know that the earth is only 6,000 years old. How do we know this? The Bible tells us so. Yet the Godless, west-coast, liberal elite geologists and anthropologists and biologists want to tell us that it's much older! Do they not read the same Bible as us real Americans?
This is the biggest problem with our education system today. These "scientists" want to make up garbage just to be contrarians to the Bible. This is what they want to feed our children. Why else are our kids becoming a bunch of Darwin-loving, west-coast, liberal elite?
Archaeologists, Anthropologists, Biologists, and Geologists, why do you hate the Bible and America?
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
Today, I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., had a truly horrifying experience, as I went with Mrs. Trumblebunks, I, Esq., to the Field Museum in Chicago. I, of course, do realize that I should have known what was in store, but I entered with an open mind, which is something that the west-coast, liberal elite is incapable of. My experience has left me with several stories to share, which I will do over the next few days. For now, I'll start with one of the most blatant attempts of liberal revisionist history.
One of the sections that we entered traced the evolution of the earth (I'll be addressing and debunking the evolution myth in the days to come, dear readers). The event started with the first known signs of life on earth, and they said that was something like four-thousand trillion years ago, although I can't recall for certain, as I was so outraged. This is the junk they're teaching our children, who are our future!
All of us open-minded Americans know that the earth is only 6,000 years old. How do we know this? The Bible tells us so. Yet the Godless, west-coast, liberal elite geologists and anthropologists and biologists want to tell us that it's much older! Do they not read the same Bible as us real Americans?
This is the biggest problem with our education system today. These "scientists" want to make up garbage just to be contrarians to the Bible. This is what they want to feed our children. Why else are our kids becoming a bunch of Darwin-loving, west-coast, liberal elite?
Archaeologists, Anthropologists, Biologists, and Geologists, why do you hate the Bible and America?
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
posted by Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq. at 8:09 PM
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