Thursdays with Theodore, Episode 5/29/08

Dear Readers,

Welcome to another exciting episode of "Thursdays with Theodore!" To the mail bag . . .

Loyal reader and friend jack X writes:

Hey, Teddy, gonna pre-order your copy of Scott McClellan's new memoir? I am!

Jack X

Jack X, what a timely question. I've ordered 5 copies so that I can burn them! This is just a disgruntled former White House employee, looking to cash in during an election year. Nothing - NOTHING - he says can be considered to be truthful. So, don't consider any of it to be true. Support the President, dear readers!

Scott McClellan, why do you hate America?!?!?!?

-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.

The Covert Threat

Dear Readers,

It's no surprise that Rachael Ray is the greatest threat facing this country. Luckily for us, patriot Michelle Malkin has unearthed conclusive proof of this fact. To you, Ms. Malkin, I say kudos.

Folks, look more closely at the picture:



If that doesn't scream "I coddle terrorists," then I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., don't know what does. Compare it to this kefiyah:



Aside from the differences in patterns, and the difference in the fringe, and the fact that one is worn on the head and the other is worn around the neck as a scarf, there is no discernible difference between the two!

Ms. Malkin, thank you for pointing out this support for terrorists that the west-coast, liberal elite, America-haters have been trying to sneak right beneath our noses! Ms. Malkin, thank you for loving America!

-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.