Top Tunes: Music for Real Americans, episode 7/24/06

Dear Readers,

Yesterday, as I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., was driving home, I flipped through the channels on my radio and caught what is undoubtedly the greatest song of all time. Naturally, I'm referring to Toby Keith's "Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue."

Here, I've reproduced the most powerful lyrics from this unbelievable song:

Justice will be served
And the battle will rage
This big dog will fight
When you rattle his cage
And you'’ll be sorry that you messed with
The U.S. of A.
`Cause we`ll put a boot in your ass
It`s the American way

Hey Uncle Sam

Put your name at the top of his list
And the Statue of Liberty
Started shakin'’ her fist
And the eagle will fly
Man, it'’s gonna be hell
When you hear Mother Freedom
Start ringin'’ her bell
And it feels like the whole wide world is raining down on you
Brought to you Courtesy of the Red White and Blue

Dear readers, does this not send shivers down your spine - shivers of patriotism and freedom? And honestly, can anyone argue that putting a boot in one's ass is not the American way? Now, the west-coast, liberal elite want to argue this isn't the best way to spread freedom, and that this is simply false bravado by some redneck. More passionately, they ask why Mr. Keith has not joined the military himself. As you can see, dear readers, they simply want to attack the messenger, but not his message!

Dear readers, buy this CD and others by a real American like Toby Keith.

Toby Keith, thank you for loving America!

-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.