I've Been Saying it All Along
Dear Readers,
As you may have heard by now, a national security incident took place today in Miami. Officials now attribute the problem to a language barrier between law enforcement and three allegedly legal immigrants. This brings to light two problems that I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., have been warning my fellow patriots about for months. Maybe now they'll start to listen.
First, we have to make English our official and ONLY language. English is the language of business, and therefore, it's all we need. If you're speaking in foreign tongues, for all we know, you could be plotting the next terrorist attack. In a time of war, banning all non-English languages is a small inconvenience to pay for security.
More importantly, I've been warning about the illegal homosexual Uruguayan immigrants streaming over our Mexican border. These potential terrorists enter our country by the millions every day. Until we put up the border fence along our entire border AND all of our coastline in this country, we won't be safe.
Dear readers, once again we have seen how vulnerable we are. Until we get serious about security, we will remain unsafe. It's time the west-coast, liberal elite, terrorist-coddlers wake up and smell the roses of security.
Terrorese-speaking truckers, why do you hate America?
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
As you may have heard by now, a national security incident took place today in Miami. Officials now attribute the problem to a language barrier between law enforcement and three allegedly legal immigrants. This brings to light two problems that I, Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq., have been warning my fellow patriots about for months. Maybe now they'll start to listen.
First, we have to make English our official and ONLY language. English is the language of business, and therefore, it's all we need. If you're speaking in foreign tongues, for all we know, you could be plotting the next terrorist attack. In a time of war, banning all non-English languages is a small inconvenience to pay for security.
More importantly, I've been warning about the illegal homosexual Uruguayan immigrants streaming over our Mexican border. These potential terrorists enter our country by the millions every day. Until we put up the border fence along our entire border AND all of our coastline in this country, we won't be safe.
Dear readers, once again we have seen how vulnerable we are. Until we get serious about security, we will remain unsafe. It's time the west-coast, liberal elite, terrorist-coddlers wake up and smell the roses of security.
Terrorese-speaking truckers, why do you hate America?
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
posted by Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq. at 12:16 AM
2 Comments:
I agree Teddy. They should all learn to speak English gooder. If they are unable to speak it they should either be deported or sent to some kind of detention centre to undergo an intensive English learning course and they should not be released until they can watch (without subtitles) and understand any episode of "24" chosen at random.
eyechan,
You've come a long way! You're dead-on here. As we both now, this is America, and these people better either love it or leave it.
-Theodore Trumblebunks, I, Esq.
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